Voice of an Angel, Arse of a Hippo'
It's hard to believe someone dating an internationally acclaimed athlete would grow this big.She's just had a hot tub installed in their Llandaff home. How low is the water line when she gets out?
Everyone around here has a 'when I met/sang karaoke with' Charlotte Church story.
My favorite is from Trevor Truelove. He was walking out of the millennium Stadium after an international rugby match. To his right, he noticed Charlotte, stopping to spark up a fag. He turned his head to watch her as he continued walking.
She's very short.
Trevor was musing about just how short she was, when he slammed into the side of a police horse.
posted by Tickersoid at 9:33 AM
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16 Comments:
yayayayay i'm first!
when i grow up i wanna smoke fags just like Charlotte!
*slaps pixie for beating me to it*
Yay! I'm second!
I can't stand Charlotte Arse-As-Big-As-A-Church.
I'm just waiting for the day when that other tramp from Girls Aloud beats her fucking brains out for her.
but...but...she sings like an angel...
She sure is turning into a bit of a porker.Pixie when you become an international singing sensation and sack Jane as your mother/manager can I become your svengali and steal 98% of your wages....I will buy you lots of fags and donuts
Isn't she that kid that became popular a few years back for her amazing singing ability?
Dang....time does work it number on some folks. She is still pretty and being from America where the average woman is a size 14, she is still skinny!
THAT'S Charlotte Church? About whom Noel Gallagher said "she fookin' 'as it"? But then Noel says a lot of interesting things...
Are police horses generally a big hazard in your parts then?
Pixie- The only aspect of Charlottes life style you should use as a model, is her love of Karaoke.
Piggy & Tazzy- That's a little harsh isn't it?
Jungle Jane- She does indeed sing like an angel. If she didn't, she'd just be another fat drunk in St Mary's street, at 3am, vomiting onto a carpet of blood, beer, kebabs and glass.
Beast- Aren't you just trying to exploit a vulnarable fairy? Still wouldn't be the first time from what I've heard.
Xtasy- Yes little Charlotte has got big in so many ways. I suspect she is slim compared to supersize Americans.
Barbara- She's "fookin'got even more of it" now. Police horses only on match days.
Bless 'er. She can be the next Sophie Dahl.
stuck up little cow, she thinks shes better then everyone else, but shes just a fat cow
Yes, us Americans are all supersize! Except for a select few...ala Nicole Ritchie. As for me...I am as big as they come....Supersize cuz I am a supersize lady.
Ok..not really, but I am sure I am fat by European standards.
Am I alone in my love of fat bottomed girls?
Is that REALLY Charlotte Church? I don't believe it. She hasn't looked porky in photos I've seen lately..? Maybe they were neck-up only.
qeeny - I think Sophie Dahl is on fucking fire. I've always been besotted with her grandma Patricia Neal (oh, that smoky voice!) and Sophie? Shit, I'd hit that.
And anyway, Queen and Spinal Tap had it right about the appeal of fat arses, anyway, so I'm with you, spike. Sex with a scrawny woman is like nailing a box spring, or so I've been told.
I love the story about Trevor. As for Charlotte, I think she still fills that bikini nicely, but holy crap we are becoming a fat society. Not healthy. I'm also grateful that I'm a nobody so my 'fat years' aren't published in a newspaper. Just the odd photo from friends' events which luckily I manage to search and destroy.
Qenny- Sophie Dahl, what a phenomena. Charlotte to her credit can always fall back on her singing. We the public are a fickle lot, and fatness eats into popularity.
100Darkangels- That's one way of presenting her.
Xtasy- A look at my last Karaoke pictures shows the supersize phenomena to be adopted over here. Austrailia has already gone the same way.
fewclewz- Behave! There are inocent pixies present.
Spike- Certainly not. It's very much a case of each to their own.
Phlegm- The weight gain is very recent. I think Charlotte is between projects and likes to go out for meals with Gavin. His heavy training means he can eat just about anything. Perhaps she's matching his input without matching his output.
The sex with a scrawny girl thing is again subjective. Works for me.
Snooze- Poor Charlotte has had to grow up in the media spotlight. All those bad boyfriends, drunken nights, Cat fights. I'm sure she can now handle it. When she needs to, It'll be easy just to go back to the gym and restore that fab' Marilyn Munroe figures she once had.
Who cares if she's fat or not - look at that hideous bikini!
It IS hideous, but stops us staring at her fat arse.
Or her double chin.
Or her nicotine stained fingers.
Or her damp patch.
The fucking trollop. Hasn't that Girls Aloud girl beat her brains out yet? (as if we'd be able to tell the difference)
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