Boomer
Like all one day courses we wanted to get it over with and go home. To this end, we'd crammed as much into the morning session as possible. When break time did finally arrive, we were all ready for a piss. The toilet, however only had one urinal.
Being thirsty, I'd made myself a coffee before arriving at the back of the long queue.
At the front, young Boomer was struggling. By nature a shy pisser, the pressure of being at the front of this cue was increasing his levels of anxiety to fresh heights.
Being at the back of a cue of around 9 guys all waiting for Boomer to 'kick off', I could see potential in this situation and I had nothing to loose.
I walked up to the side of the single urinal and bent my head down to within about a foot of Boomers knob and started to egg him on.
"Come on little Boo'. You can do it! Give us your best shot......"
"Oh for fucks sake." Boomer sighed in despair, "I'll never be able to start now."
He zipped up and retreated to the back of the queue.
My work here was done.
Being thirsty, I'd made myself a coffee before arriving at the back of the long queue.
At the front, young Boomer was struggling. By nature a shy pisser, the pressure of being at the front of this cue was increasing his levels of anxiety to fresh heights.
Being at the back of a cue of around 9 guys all waiting for Boomer to 'kick off', I could see potential in this situation and I had nothing to loose.
I walked up to the side of the single urinal and bent my head down to within about a foot of Boomers knob and started to egg him on.
"Come on little Boo'. You can do it! Give us your best shot......"
"Oh for fucks sake." Boomer sighed in despair, "I'll never be able to start now."
He zipped up and retreated to the back of the queue.
My work here was done.
posted by Tickersoid at 8:25 PM
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17 Comments:
Yippee! First!
Cruel, but very funny. The things you straight boys get away with!
I piss alone
I dont want nobody to know
I havent got the pressure of
some of the other boys
they make a noise
it scares me so.........
Qenny- I've suffered from shy pisser syndrome in the past so I completely sympathise. On the other hand, I had to balance that against a good comedic opportunity.
Mushroom- Poetic! Oh, btw your girly soccer picture is now doing the rounds of my emails.
You little monkey!
Although I didn't know where this story was going after the line 'So I bent down next to the urinal...'
Pisser syndrome? I think this requires a separate posting.
pee shy. Well, sometimes you've got to take one for the team, tickers. Well done for stepping up to bat!
You are a nasty man! ( but you knew that already!)
That alone would have made me piss myself Lauphing.., oh wait, it did. Clean up time :-(
Too cruel...now he probably has a bladder infection. Heehee!
Lee- I'm sure I don't know what you mean.
MJ- Just one of those 'men' things.
You go to the urinal and nothing happens. You then start to wonder if the other guys are wondering what you're doing there. This makes you more nervous, etc. More of a cycle than a syndrome really.
Plegmfatale- I know, snap me in half and I have 'hero' written all the way through.
Lippy- Nasty, Moi? You must appreciate I only did it for the greater good of all the participants.
ickle_bro- With you at the front we wouldn't have had a problem.
Xtasy- I'm sure I only relieved his anxiety by forcing him to retire temporarily.
I've also heard it called "Shy bladder syndrome."
I often wonder if you were always like this. I can imagine you standing there in line thinking how funny it would be to put your face within inches of ... and then realizing that you can blog the whole thing after. Blogging encourages strange behavior. I want a photo next time.
A friend who retrained as a hynotherapist said most of the guys that came to him were trying to resolve the phobia of urinating in "public"
MJ- Are there no subjects of which you are ignorant?
Shandi- I didn't think of blogging it until later. I do however think, 'Oh, that'll work on a post'.
Photo's! what kind of a pervert do you take me for. NO, don't answer that.
Mental Mac- Really, I didn't realise it was that important.
Oh dear you wicked thing! I had my own mishap with the men's room at DFW myself this weekend. We had to wait in line for check in and I was so cross by the time I got through I stomped straight into...well it turns out on account of my head being down while I dragged my luggage behind me muttering to myself that by the time I looked up I was already in the middle of the restroom and thought "How odd to have urinals in here." Then "How odd that men should be at the women's urinals!" Then out loud "Bloody Hell!" While I beat a hasty retreat. Some unkind british blokes started laughing at me. I wish I had of thought of something witty to say...sigh. Glad we don't suffer from this "shy bladder" thingy the women's lines are always long enough as it is. Good story!
I can't do math to save my life.
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