I'll pass on the menage-a-trois thank you.

For straight young men in the 1970's, the menage a trois was considered the holy grail of sex. Perhaps not so much for the experience but more for the heightened status one might achieve amongst ones peers.

Ginny was a very close friend. Voluptuous, hard drinking, union militant, rock chick from a middle class family. We've laughed, cried and spent much time with each other. Someone to share a glance with without having to speak.
On this particular Saturday night in the lounge of the 'Old Arcade' we were in different groups. I was with my mate Rick at a window table whilst she was standing, as always, at the bar with the guys.
As I went up to the bar to order another round, she intercepted me and asked,

"Tickers, I'm far more 'hammered and stoned' than you've ever seen me before, will you promise me you'll make sure I get home OK?"

She was important to me so I'd have said 'yes' under any circumstances, but with the 'two men to every eligible girl' ratio that existed at the time, the chances of me 'pulling' were relatively slim, so it didn't seem much of a sacrifice.

Later, whilst ordering my next round she asked me again. I reassured her she was safe, I'd not forget her. To be honest, I was flattered that out of all the guys she knew, I was the one she trusted to see her right.

It was about half a pint later when Betty Boop, the girl I considered to be the sexiest lady on the planet, bounced up to me in her usual effervescent style and asked, without pre-amble, if I'd like to spend a night of passion in bed with her and her friend Liz.

*blinks*

My thoughts exploded into many different directions. Imagining them both naked, wondering where, what about Ginny, could I subcontract my responsibilities? And how this might be a once in a life time opportunity.

"I'm sorry Betty, can't do it tonight, I promised Ginny I'd make sure she got home OK."

I couldn't believe the words that came out of my mouth. Would they take a rain check I wondered, but didn't have the nerve to ask.

Betty turned to Rick, "How about you Rick?"

Rick had just lifted his pint of Brains SA and didn't react other than to slowly sup his ale. Equally slowly he placed his drink back down on the bar mat and replied,

"Err, no thanks Betty."

She didn't stop to argue and moved instead to the guys at the bar.

I looked at Rick. I knew he hadn't had sex for some time so I waited for an explanation which didn't come.

"Rick, what's wrong with you? I'd have thought you'd jump at the chance."

"Thing is.." He mused, "...I don't find Liz very attractive."

True she wasn't the prettiest girl, I learned later that she'd been complaining to Betty she couldn't give herself away, Betty had kindly, but very unconventionally, offered to 'throw herself in' to increase the value of the 'Liz package'.

"Never mind that, what about the 'box ticking' factor and what about Betty herself?"

"To be honest" he said, still with no trace of excitement in his voice, "Betty terrifies me."

I couldn't argue with that.

-----------------------------------------

Months later I did get the opportunity to 'tick the box' but reality is often very different to fantasy. With my 'blokes' inability to multitask, and being a little overwhelmed by the event, I was unable to rise to the occasion. I resolved never to repeat the experience.