May Day...May Day..Are you receiving me over.
Since starting blogging, I've noticed I hardly ever watch TV. In this valley I can't use a freeview box and the only channel I can receive well is BBC 1. BBC2 and ITV are of variable quality and S4C is in bloody Welsh!
Usually I stop for a coffee break, switch on, channel hop, think, 'God this is shite', then switch off.
So when the bill for the TV license arrived, I bin it.
I'm blogging when the 'phone rings.
Asian sounding lady: "Could I possibly speak to Mr Tickersoid please."
Me: "No I'm afraid you can't"
*hangs up*
It rings again almost immediately.
"Asian sounding lady: "I'M NOT A TELECOMS COLD CALLER."
I apologies. Turns out, she wants me to renew my license there and then with a credit card.
Me: "That pre-supposes I watch TV."
Asian sounding lady: "Don't you?"
Me: "God no! All that repetition, It's like being stuck in a lift with a drunk"
Actually she was very helpful, told me to take out the aerial lead and 'mess up' the TV tuning for when the investigators come.
--------------------
Little Miss stayed with me yesterday. Yea! She was a bit dismayed at the lack of TV, especially as the local video store had no available copies of 'Saw II'. The second choice movie didn't play. So we spent time in my bedroom showing each other, where we go on the internet.
After, she starts nosing around and finds a disc beside my TV/DVD combi'.
"What's this disc?" she asks as she turns it over.
"That is a cinematic classic." I say.
She reads the hand written title, "Sun, Sea and Shagging?" Miss looks at me with raised eyebrows.
"A masterpiece of it's genre" I announce.
------------------------
About fifteen minutes later we're in the smoke darkened kitchen.
"Do you want an apple?" I ask.
"No"
"Would you like to carve a face in an apple?" She loves a project.
"Oh yes" Little miss takes the apple and looks for a knife.
As she settles down on a chair to begin, she asks,
"Why carve a face on an apple?"
"Why climb Everest?" I reply.
"Well, then you can say you've climbed Everest?"
"Well, you can say you've carved a face in an apple"
"But loads have people have carved a face in an apple"
"Well then, there must be a good reason for it."
She looks at me smiling, to check I'm aware of the stupid logic. I'm smiling back, so she shakes her head and starts carving.
Usually I stop for a coffee break, switch on, channel hop, think, 'God this is shite', then switch off.
So when the bill for the TV license arrived, I bin it.
I'm blogging when the 'phone rings.
Asian sounding lady: "Could I possibly speak to Mr Tickersoid please."
Me: "No I'm afraid you can't"
*hangs up*
It rings again almost immediately.
"Asian sounding lady: "I'M NOT A TELECOMS COLD CALLER."
I apologies. Turns out, she wants me to renew my license there and then with a credit card.
Me: "That pre-supposes I watch TV."
Asian sounding lady: "Don't you?"
Me: "God no! All that repetition, It's like being stuck in a lift with a drunk"
Actually she was very helpful, told me to take out the aerial lead and 'mess up' the TV tuning for when the investigators come.
--------------------
Little Miss stayed with me yesterday. Yea! She was a bit dismayed at the lack of TV, especially as the local video store had no available copies of 'Saw II'. The second choice movie didn't play. So we spent time in my bedroom showing each other, where we go on the internet.
After, she starts nosing around and finds a disc beside my TV/DVD combi'.
"What's this disc?" she asks as she turns it over.
"That is a cinematic classic." I say.
She reads the hand written title, "Sun, Sea and Shagging?" Miss looks at me with raised eyebrows.
"A masterpiece of it's genre" I announce.
------------------------
About fifteen minutes later we're in the smoke darkened kitchen.
"Do you want an apple?" I ask.
"No"
"Would you like to carve a face in an apple?" She loves a project.
"Oh yes" Little miss takes the apple and looks for a knife.
As she settles down on a chair to begin, she asks,
"Why carve a face on an apple?"
"Why climb Everest?" I reply.
"Well, then you can say you've climbed Everest?"
"Well, you can say you've carved a face in an apple"
"But loads have people have carved a face in an apple"
"Well then, there must be a good reason for it."
She looks at me smiling, to check I'm aware of the stupid logic. I'm smiling back, so she shakes her head and starts carving.
posted by Tickersoid at 11:11 AM
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25 Comments:
yay, first!!!
Actually, I think this is much healthier than television - at least on the internet one is not completely passive as with TV.
I love the fact that the television license woman called right back. That would have made my day. That, and your title for the DVD.
200 miles away from home and still I beat IDV to the comments box.
*looks smug*
Phlegm- It occured to me the other day, that the internet is like going back to the days when we made our own entertainment.
Snooze- My day always gets made when I'm with Little Miss for the day. She's so much fun.
Fuckkit And on Wi (ti) Fi. What ever that is.
You boy....at the back...IDV. You're slacking again, aren't you boy.
*taps cane in hand in a threatening manner*
aw, you are just the sweetest Dad. (porn and all!)
I agree about the TV. There are only so many hours in the day and all useless activities must stop. Watching TV is pretty useless.
Kyah, I am a sweety in'I.
I hate the way TV programs are padded out. Very low on entertainment items per hour.
What's a TV license ? I am completely clueless.
I have just bought a fuck off 32" monster - it's like being in a cinema. i wont have a word said against TV.
not to pester you or anything, but are you actually receiving e-mail?
I don't think its working.
*scratches head*
I'm with you on the T.V thing. But saying that, I have fallen in love with Sky plus. Now I can watch programmes when I want, if there is ever anything on that is.
Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick BOOM! I've just read your bloggs after not reading it for a few weeks (Don't know why) Tick, you make me laugh! Why the fuck your sat up on that inspection bridge when you have the power of vocabulary that you do is beyond me.
Good night and God Bless
Leggy
Tickers, tell Little Miss to put that in her pipe and smoke it...
xtasy & shifty- The BBC is uniquely funded, entirely by the TV licence (£131 pa) You have to have a TV licence if you recieve any TV channels, even if you don't watch any BBC at all.
The only commercials you get, are for other BBC products. This has two main advantages. 1) impatiallity, and 2) Daring, experimental programming.
In spite of this the BBC insist on wasting licence payers money, producing soap operas and competing against commercial channels for sporting events, when that is something those channels do very well. What's the point. It just alienates people like me.
frobe- you may well posess such a 32" monster, but it's girth that really counts.
kyah Did you try stuart.young03@ntlworld.com I haven't recieved anything recently. No messages this morning.
slut- I'm looking into the Sky standard package at the moment. If I have more channels it might be worth paying the licence. Even if it's just for Little Miss.
Leggy- Mato! Maybe I'll try something involving my special tallents when they shut us all down in a couple of years. Mind you it's sitting alone on the inspection bridge that gives me time to think up all this stuff.
Anyway, knowing the kind of character you are, and you are one hell of a character, I'm sure you could provide me with some cracking stories. I've got one about you on the back burner at the moment.
jjane- Ha Ha! I'll show her that next time she comes.
I would love to give up paying the licence, since I only really watch DVDs. However, Lovely Husband™ is a TV junky, and watches every one of the kind of shows the TV licence shouldn't be wasted on. Although he does also appreciate high quality dramas, which Auntie does churn out on a regular basis.
Internet and vide games, though - much better, stimulating, engaging activities.
qenny- A man after my own heart. Do you have two monitors in the same room, so you can enjoy each others company?
yes, we definitely make our own entertainment here. And unlike chat or some social site where you are at the mercy of company that is available in a finite moment and the conversation is lost immediately to the ether, on blog a conversation can be carried on over the space of days and with many participants - it's a great forum - all united by the toasty glow of countless millions of pixels...
Blogging rules! Hurrah for the toasty glow!
Forgive my ignorance. Do they have cable TV in the UK?
We have cable here, but not in remote places like this. Satalite is the only option.
Yay! Last!
* bends over for a good caning *
Will satellite signals reach all the down into those remote, dark valleys?
*administering cane*
This is Wales boy, not Mars!
I used to watch T.V., before blogging of course. My attention span has... what was I saying?
Loved the interaction with Lil' Miss.
well hello there daddios. O god the exciting lives we lead apple carving and porn...... even if you did break the ear off of the former which was probably due to increased right arm grip from the latter.
jungle jane - oooh he never told me he climbed everest ....... i got to go now carve more apples.
Little Miss- That's as funny as it is clever. Well done.
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