Chocolate and vodka trifle
Ingredients-
750ml of vodka.
200g of your favorite chocolate. ( Chocolate cake will do )
Small pot of whipping cream
Appx 3 rusks.
Slab of fruit jelly.
Any quantity of really cheap custard mix. ( Out of date is fine )
1/2 pt of milk if required.
One or two veracious omnivors. (poodles work for me )
Preparation.
Take a liberal swig of vodka to get you in the mood.
Line the bottom of a bowl with broken rusk.
Take another swig of vodka.
Make up the jelly by dissolving it in 1/2 pt of boiling water.
Fill a shot glass with one finger of vodka and knock it back.
Pour the jelly mix into the bowl such that it just covers the rusk.
No vodka this time, but prepare a tall glass of vodka with ice, coke or a fruit cordial to taste.
Using a fresh bowl, make up the custard mix according to the instructions. It doesn't really mater if you mix it, but you can if you feel up to it.
Move both bowls to the fridge to set.
Fill an eye wash cup to the brim with more vodka, and remembering to keep your eye open, give yourself a quick fix.
Take the tall glass of vodka and have a long hot bath, preferably with candles and aromatic oils, while you wait for the jelly to set. Don't use rose petals as clearing out the plug hole when your getting pissed is a bummer.
Put on a fluffy white bath robe and towel turban. Place bottles of nail varnish, nail varnish remover and the remaining vodka on the table next to your favorite chair or sofa. Add some cotton wool balls, cream (whipped or otherwise ) and the chocolate or cake.
Settle down and bung a 'chick flick' into the DVD player.
When you think the jelly has set, it doesn't really mater if it has or not, press pause and remove the bowl from the fridge and spoon or pour ( whichever is appropriate) the custard over the jelly.
Feed the resulting slop to the veracious omnivors.
Continue to watch movie whilst painting toe nails, and dipping chocolate into cream.
Alternate this with more tall glasses of vodka, util the warm glow of contentment caresses your soul.
750ml of vodka.
200g of your favorite chocolate. ( Chocolate cake will do )
Small pot of whipping cream
Appx 3 rusks.
Slab of fruit jelly.
Any quantity of really cheap custard mix. ( Out of date is fine )
1/2 pt of milk if required.
One or two veracious omnivors. (poodles work for me )
Preparation.
Take a liberal swig of vodka to get you in the mood.
Line the bottom of a bowl with broken rusk.
Take another swig of vodka.
Make up the jelly by dissolving it in 1/2 pt of boiling water.
Fill a shot glass with one finger of vodka and knock it back.
Pour the jelly mix into the bowl such that it just covers the rusk.
No vodka this time, but prepare a tall glass of vodka with ice, coke or a fruit cordial to taste.
Using a fresh bowl, make up the custard mix according to the instructions. It doesn't really mater if you mix it, but you can if you feel up to it.
Move both bowls to the fridge to set.
Fill an eye wash cup to the brim with more vodka, and remembering to keep your eye open, give yourself a quick fix.
Take the tall glass of vodka and have a long hot bath, preferably with candles and aromatic oils, while you wait for the jelly to set. Don't use rose petals as clearing out the plug hole when your getting pissed is a bummer.
Put on a fluffy white bath robe and towel turban. Place bottles of nail varnish, nail varnish remover and the remaining vodka on the table next to your favorite chair or sofa. Add some cotton wool balls, cream (whipped or otherwise ) and the chocolate or cake.
Settle down and bung a 'chick flick' into the DVD player.
When you think the jelly has set, it doesn't really mater if it has or not, press pause and remove the bowl from the fridge and spoon or pour ( whichever is appropriate) the custard over the jelly.
Feed the resulting slop to the veracious omnivors.
Continue to watch movie whilst painting toe nails, and dipping chocolate into cream.
Alternate this with more tall glasses of vodka, util the warm glow of contentment caresses your soul.
posted by Tickersoid at 10:22 AM
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7 Comments:
Sounds like it would work equally well with gin.
* nips off to try it out *
Apart from the chick flick that sounds like a perfect evening. Substitute that for a good horror and I'll be over in an hour ;)
inex'device- Don't do the hand flame thing near gin.
fuckkit- Ok try '28 days later....'( best zombie film ever ) and 'Saw'
Tagon- You always laugh at the scary bits anyway.
The bath robe, has the paradoxical feature of making you feel both, naked and cosseted at the same time.
I don't know!
I'm a bloke trying to write from a womans perspective.
I always see cotten wool balls when ladies are doing nails. Don't you stick them between your toes or use them to correct the alcohol induced mistakes? Why do midwives always call for boiling water? Do they just fancy a cuppa' whilst they dig out babies and gibblets. I don't know!
I'm just a bloke! ;)
not all women use cotton balls, & as for midwives you tell me!
Tigereyes and Anon- I know who you are and I know where you live.
the poor omnivors! be careful you don't kill them! :-)
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